By Richard Chmielewski
Bob Carr started in the field of psychology 1979 when he worked for one year in a children’s psychiatric daycare center. There he was confronted with the reality of boys and girls from the age or 2 to 7, suffering from severe emotional problems to autism to psychosis.
“I first started to hone my skills there and determined that I would go to college, and study, to help these kids. I went to college and got a four-year degree inPsychology. I learned that in order to best make an impact on these children I had to get a Master’s in Social Work. I graduated in 1984.
While in college Carr was “around some excellent therapists” He had one colleague who convinced him to go on and get his Master’s degree in Social Work, where he could do the best. That friend “taught me how to be a therapist. That’s what I wanted to do. I wanted to be a really good therapist.”
That year I started working for the State at the local psychiatric center and became a Psychiatric Social Worker. I worked there for 29 years. In 1994, I opened up my private practice where I treated adults as well as children.”Over the years Carr was involved with Kids Oneida, an organization that works with “at risk” children, who might otherwise end up in foster homes or prison. He eventually retired from the State and began working for Mental Health Connections.
Carr continued his private practice and had a few rather private issues that influenced him to go into a career in counseling.Bob explained that “counselors help people with their problems in life. A lot of people realize that what they are doing is not helping them. Counseling helps them to understand their problems, so that they can have happier lives, not be depressed or stressed out.”
“We help people gain insight into their problems. They then work to solve their problems, to function better.I think the goal is to help the person to fix the problems themselves. I think that deep down inside they know what they need to do. They sometimes need validation, that they’re on the right track. The counselor helps them find their way.
A great thinker, innovator therapist was the physician and “Father of Family Therapy,” Dr. Carl Whitaker. He wrote that “Life is a dance.” Whatever solution they come to, that’s their solution. Counselors can be very instrumental in finding the answers to their own problems.”
Asked if there were “formulas” used by therapists in helping people.Bob quickly, and with conviction, replied, “I think that in some respects there is a formula. If you just listen, and not intervene, to go in a more functional, better direction, it’s not enough. Letting people ventilate, and caring, are so important. What I’ve seen, the greatest counselors/ therapists are very active. They intervene all the time. In a lot of ways, there is a formula.”
Asked about empathy and caring, he again quickly offered, “Yes, again, Carl Whitaker. The ‘anesthesia’ for the pain that the patient and family feel is the caring. People need to know that you are on a mission to help them. May be the techniques don’t matter that much, that the caring may be more important. “Having worked in psychiatric children’s centers, psychiatric hospitals, in prisons and in community clinics, Bob Carr treats people from all walks of life. “I have a varied background and have run across most of the diagnoses. I have learned over time with all the diagnoses, some more than others, counseling can be very beneficial.“The goal is to help people, if possible, often, without medications. However, early on, the patient might be evaluated for medication. Here at the Falcon Clinic, we have aPsychiatric Nurse Practitioner who is very well experienced in using judicious medications when needed. It would be good to work through the patient’s problem and wean off medication, however, many patients need to be on medication for a while.”“With a child with, for example, ADHD, I would talk with the parents. Does your child have a problem at home or at school? What kind of problem? Sometimes you have a problem where the child can’t calm down, can’t focus, not doing well in school. The child may get angry, may act out. Once that starts, the child can act out and be violent to other children.”And Carr indicates that early intervention always better. “I’ve had parents tell me that, right from birth, they saw that something was wrong. The child was crying, banging their head against the wall, etc. Early intervention is extremely important.”And what might make a parent think about bringing their child in for counseling?“Usually, the child is having problems at home or school. They may be acting out, stealing or choking another child. A teenager may be depressed, starting to be promiscuous, or using drugs, such as marijuana. A lot of children have the oppositional disorder. They are angry.”“You have to assess fairly quickly whether or not medications should be used. Do we want to put the children on medication? No, but sometimes, down the road, they might need some medical intervention.”
Bob continued, “I would talk with the parent alone first. I want to get a feel for them as to what the problem is. What behavior is the child displaying and for how long? How angry is your child? Ten being “super angry”.After talking with the parents, I talk with the child, what their perspective is. Sometimes we have the parents together with the child and sometimes alone with the child. Sometimes children want to talk with the counselor alone, to find out what’s going on at home and how they really feel.”
An appointment for a counseling session with Mr. Bob Carr, LCSW-R, can be made through the Falcon Clinic for Health, Wellness and Recovery, 1 Oxford Crossing, Suite #1, New Hartford, NY by calling 315-507-4751. Most insurances are accepted. For more information on the various services offered at the clinic, please go to, http://www.falconclinic.com
